Should Your Relationship Have Goals?

Planning is for everyone. It is for companies, but also for individuals, for families, for man and wife. And when I say this I do not simply mean planning your weekly menu or vacation itineraries, but the kind that big organizations are made of like strategic and tactical planning. Now if you think this is a little too serious for a simple family, then we ought to think again.

If you ask me, man and wife are doing the most serious work on the planet as they come together in providing a good base or backbone for the future of any society. Is it not that by merely opening our homes for lunches and dinners, we give way to meaningful partnerships and conversations? So it is with raising our kids. Though it sounds domestic, the real work here is in shaping generations who will, one day, change the world.

I can never say it enough—marriage is an important partnership. And if it so, we must know that planning is crucial for the health and harnessing of this team’s potential every year. Here are three convincing reasons why I highly encourage husbands and wives to do this regularly.

1. Alignment

Cars need regular tune ups because some parts may be worn out and misaligned over time. Marriages are the same. The drudgery of everyday bills and real life can quickly take two people to two very different paths, so man and wife must keep one another on the same page always.

Tip: My suggestion is to make a number of points in the areas of: marriage, family, career, finances, community, and spiritual. Consider your values, choice of focus for the year, and priorities, and reassess according to the reality of your faith and season. Then, agree to go back to your list quarterly.

2. Agreement

Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. -Matthew 18:19

Do two walk together, unless they have agreed to meet? -Amos 3:3

Something powerful happens when we agree. While it is good to be aligned, there is strength in holding the same values, pursuing complimentary goals, with the same intensity.

The yoke is a figurative symbol of being bound to our spouse, but it is actually a contraption used for the oxen. It is a crossbar fastened over their necks, and attached to the plough they are to pull. This is done to make any work they do to be twice more efficient and powerful. Needless to say that when man and wife are in solid agreement, their work will be accomplished with increased efficiency, added force, and much more power!

Tip: Planning will force two people to confront disagreements, so just go ahead and talk. When differences arise, lobby for what you think is better in this season, and agree to give way to the better option. Remember, there is power in agreement. Conversely, disagreements bring you to a fruitless impasse.

3. Appreciation

It takes two to tango! When man and wife plan and discuss their tasks at work and in the home for the year, both see so much of what the other has to do. Personally, I have become more grateful about my husband because of our annual strategic planning meetings! Because it makes me realise a very important thing: that life becomes less doable and less exciting apart from my partner in life.

Tip: Regularly express appreciation and encouragement to your spouse. Studies show employees don’t leave companies but bosses. Just remember that it is also to your interest that the marriage operates in a positive and encouraging environment.

God bless all the married readers of Olivia. May you and your husband have a fruitful 2017!

Which of these three reasons do you need to apply in your marriage today?

Mrs BO is a wife, mom, writer, mentor, innovator, daughter of God. She is now the founder of Olivia Women and author of devotional materials, after more than two decades of professional performance on Philippine TV and cinema. Next to Jesus, she says that she cannot live without her husband, son, and good coffee. She absolutely loves caramel apples and hates small talk. She blogs marriage, motherhood, and travels, on